Sep 22, 2013, 12:30 PM EDT
Shaquille O’Neal is not overly fond of the Pelicans nickname. This is not an uncommon opinion. Shaq’s reasoning for not liking the new name, though? Pretty spectacular.
“It’s a terrible name. I told Charles on TNT, I don’t think I’ve seen a Pelican before. Pelicans, are they that big white bird? I would had named them Tigers, Crawfish or something. Pelicans — no. But I wish them well.”
So many questions for you, Shaq. You really haven’t seen a Pelican before? It’s Louisiana’s state bird. You went to LSU. They were in Finding Nemo. You have children. Come on, Shaq. You yelled about Birdman for the entire postseason and now you know nothing about birds? Nice try. Are you undercover again?
Seriously, though, man. Crawfish? That’s your suggestion? Something cool like Tigers, or maybe crawfish? Pelicans could probably eat crawfish, bro. I don’t know if that’s true or not because I haven’t watched the Discovery channel in a really long time, but you don’t go down the food chain in search of a better nickname. You just don’t.
That’s alright, though. Nicknames are hard, you’ve wasted your ammo on yourself over the years, and now you’re spent. All good. New Orleans fans have plenty of reasons to be happy though, right? Bright future, yes?
I’ll be anxious to see how many jerseys they sell. Hopefully one day they’ll get some marquee players and fill the arena up because it’s a town that wants to support something good. Louisiana, in general, if you give them a good product, they’ll get in their RVs and drive and they will support you. Hopefully, one day we’ll get two or three good players that people would want to spend their money on.
I suppose the thought of hearing, “Nice Pelicans jersey!” could push someone with Ornithophobia away from a purchase, even if the name on the front says New Orleans. As for the names on the back? Anthony Davis, Jrue Holiday, Eric Gordon, Ryan Anderson and Tyreke Evans are pretty good players, but are they “fire up the RV” good?
But again, we need to two or three marquee players. I mean you can’t charge the prices that we charge and not give them a good product. So hopefully the first pick, Anthony Davis, and Doc Rivers’ son (Austin Rivers) hopefully have the same impact the ‘Splash Brothers’ (Golden State guards Stephen Curry and Klay Thompson) had last season.
So New Orleans fans, it sounds like Shaq thinks your new nickname stinks, you might not sell many jerseys, you don’t have good players that are worth spending money to watch, and your hopes of making a big impact rest partially with Austin Rivers, of all people.
But, you know, other than that? Go big white birds!
Apr 1, 2015, 7:29 PM EDT
Jordan Brand keeps with the Space Jam theme in advance of this weekend’s retro releases.
Apr 1, 2015, 7:04 PM EDT
Oubre a potential lottery pick
Apr 1, 2015, 6:15 PM EDT
He’s a bubble first round pick.
Apr 1, 2015, 5:33 PM EDT
He had only played in one of the last dozen Heat games.
Apr 1, 2015, 4:51 PM EDT
Seen at Summer League he was project, we’ll see how far along he has come.
Apr 1, 2015, 4:21 PM EDT
Curry is going to win this award. More than that, he’s earned it.
Apr 1, 2015, 3:15 PM EDT
Anderson has missed the last 18 games due to injury, and New Orleans is trying to catch OKC for the final playoff spot in the West.
Apr 1, 2015, 2:30 PM EDT
A 16th during the regular season would mean a one-game suspension.
Apr 1, 2015, 1:50 PM EDT
Stephenson didn’t play in his team’s last game as a result of the coach’s decision.
Apr 1, 2015, 1:10 PM EDT
Not as devastating as the one that’s made the rounds, but deadly nonetheless.
Apr 1, 2015, 12:30 PM EDT
We know it’s LeBron’s world in Cleveland, but this makes Blatt look a bit silly.
Apr 1, 2015, 11:50 AM EDT
This isn’t the first time one of the Clippers has publicly pointed out the obvious.
Apr 1, 2015, 11:10 AM EDT
The rivalry continues.
Kevin Durant says he’d ‘love to’ stay with Thunder his entire career, wants his jersey retired in OKC
Apr 1, 2015, 10:30 AM EDT
Durant will be an unrestricted free agent after next season.
Apr 1, 2015, 9:50 AM EDT
The Internet went nuts with memes of Paul falling down, and he got in on the fun himself.
Apr 1, 2015, 9:10 AM EDT
Apr 1, 2015, 8:30 AM EDT
Hollins believes what he believes, evidence to the contrary be damned.
Apr 1, 2015, 8:00 AM EDT
He was the reason the Clippers were close to the Warriors.
Apr 1, 2015, 1:34 AM EDT
We may have to watch the Nets in the playoffs. Lord help us all.
Apr 1, 2015, 12:50 AM EDT
Curry just dropped the best defensive point guard in the NBA.
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- Kevin Durant says he’d ‘love to’ stay with Thunder his entire career, wants his jersey retired in OKC 12
- Anthony Davis says James Harden should be MVP 20
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- Thunder say Kevin Durant underwent successful bone graft surgery, will return in 4-6 months 4
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- Derrick Rose returns to full-contact practice, Bulls return date still unknown 13