Sep 22, 2013, 12:30 PM EDT
Shaquille O’Neal is not overly fond of the Pelicans nickname. This is not an uncommon opinion. Shaq’s reasoning for not liking the new name, though? Pretty spectacular.
“It’s a terrible name. I told Charles on TNT, I don’t think I’ve seen a Pelican before. Pelicans, are they that big white bird? I would had named them Tigers, Crawfish or something. Pelicans — no. But I wish them well.”
So many questions for you, Shaq. You really haven’t seen a Pelican before? It’s Louisiana’s state bird. You went to LSU. They were in Finding Nemo. You have children. Come on, Shaq. You yelled about Birdman for the entire postseason and now you know nothing about birds? Nice try. Are you undercover again?
Seriously, though, man. Crawfish? That’s your suggestion? Something cool like Tigers, or maybe crawfish? Pelicans could probably eat crawfish, bro. I don’t know if that’s true or not because I haven’t watched the Discovery channel in a really long time, but you don’t go down the food chain in search of a better nickname. You just don’t.
That’s alright, though. Nicknames are hard, you’ve wasted your ammo on yourself over the years, and now you’re spent. All good. New Orleans fans have plenty of reasons to be happy though, right? Bright future, yes?
I’ll be anxious to see how many jerseys they sell. Hopefully one day they’ll get some marquee players and fill the arena up because it’s a town that wants to support something good. Louisiana, in general, if you give them a good product, they’ll get in their RVs and drive and they will support you. Hopefully, one day we’ll get two or three good players that people would want to spend their money on.
I suppose the thought of hearing, “Nice Pelicans jersey!” could push someone with Ornithophobia away from a purchase, even if the name on the front says New Orleans. As for the names on the back? Anthony Davis, Jrue Holiday, Eric Gordon, Ryan Anderson and Tyreke Evans are pretty good players, but are they “fire up the RV” good?
But again, we need to two or three marquee players. I mean you can’t charge the prices that we charge and not give them a good product. So hopefully the first pick, Anthony Davis, and Doc Rivers’ son (Austin Rivers) hopefully have the same impact the ‘Splash Brothers’ (Golden State guards Stephen Curry and Klay Thompson) had last season.
So New Orleans fans, it sounds like Shaq thinks your new nickname stinks, you might not sell many jerseys, you don’t have good players that are worth spending money to watch, and your hopes of making a big impact rest partially with Austin Rivers, of all people.
But, you know, other than that? Go big white birds!
Jul 31, 2015, 11:08 PM EDT
He looks like a guy who can live up to the No. 1 pick billing.
Jul 31, 2015, 10:26 PM EDT
Norris Cole is still looking for a bigger payday.
Jul 31, 2015, 9:31 PM EDT
Her credentials are unassailable.
Jul 31, 2015, 8:10 PM EDT
He is currently out on bond.
Jul 31, 2015, 7:15 PM EDT
Hill told the police he was “in a hurry.” I guess so.
Jul 31, 2015, 7:01 PM EDT
Neither guy is going to make a difference on the court for these teams. This was just moving some money around.
Jul 31, 2015, 5:46 PM EDT
Crabbe looked good in Las Vegas at Summer League.
Jul 31, 2015, 4:59 PM EDT
The Kings don’t really have the roster spot for him.
Jul 31, 2015, 4:11 PM EDT
Iowa Energy add Nicki Gross to coaching staff
Jul 31, 2015, 3:20 PM EDT
Will he accept the required tender?
Jul 31, 2015, 2:35 PM EDT
The Phil Jackson Effect
Jul 31, 2015, 1:58 PM EDT
Why does USA Basketball chairman make such a distinction?
Jul 31, 2015, 12:52 PM EDT
Johnson makes $24.9 million, but this is the last year of his contract.
Jul 31, 2015, 12:47 PM EDT
New York drafted Giannis Antetokounmpo’s brother last year
Jul 31, 2015, 10:23 AM EDT
No. 58 pick will reportedly head overseas or to D-League
Jul 31, 2015, 9:21 AM EDT
Guard didn’t show much in short stint in New York
Jul 31, 2015, 8:35 AM EDT
“One thing to come out of this will be more camps, more clinics, more games, more youth competition, and from that you get into infrastructure, and building more courts.” —Masai Ujiri, Raptors GM and native Nigerian
Jul 31, 2015, 7:59 AM EDT
“And the coin flip was as much about, is there going to be anything else that we could do? Because we knew we had to do something.” —Mark Cuban on trading for Rajon Rondo.
Jul 30, 2015, 11:30 PM EDT
Hoiberg has a much stronger offensive reputation than Tom Thibodeau.
Jul 30, 2015, 10:43 PM EDT
Portland received Mike Miller and two second-round picks in addition to Haywood.
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