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NBA referees everywhere conspire against Lakers

Feb 25, 2010, 7:24 PM EDT

It’s just blatant, obvious fact that no member of the Los Angeles Lakers has never committed a foul or ever committed a violation that would result in a turnover. So naturally, we were all as outraged as Andrew Bynum was to find out that not only were the Lakers were called for 20 — twenty! — personal fouls during last night’s game against the Mavericks, but Bynum himself was called twice for traveling violations. Here was Bynum’s reaction to CBS in Los Angeles concerning the biggest atrocity in the history of officiating (via Mark Francescutti of the Dallas Morning News):

“It’s hard to play 8 on 5…When I asked one of the officials, how did you call a
travel? He said, “I didn’t see a travel.” “The guy who called it looked
me in my eyes and said “I didn’t see a travel.”

Then in reference to a foul that he thought should have been called
on Dirk Nowitzki, Bynum says the referee told him, “I didn’t think it
was going to mess your shot up.”

Lets not even pretend for a second that those travels could have been the product of anything less than flawless footwork from Bynum, who is not only wholly dominant but also bearing flawless work ethic. And those 20 fouls? It’s not even possible that they came as a result of some uncharacteristically lazy defense. Not even in the very realm of possibility.

Look, being called for fouls and turnovers…that’s just not Los Angeles Lakers basketball; their power is unmatchable, their grace is undeniable, and their focus and execution on both ends of the court is completely unwavering. If you’ve been to the STAPLES center, you’d know that.

And don’t even give me that “the refs aren’t perfect, they’ll miss calls on both sides” nonsense. This is an institutional conspiracy. David Stern loves LeBron James and obviously wants the Lakers to lose every game. That’s why the Mavs only committed 16 turnovers while the Lakers committed 17. And that’s why the Lakers were called for 20 fouls while the Mavs were called for 20 fouls. Every referee in the NBA was given the explicit order to make tons of calls against the Lakers, and last night’s game was only the latest piece of evidence to prove it.

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